The problem with music

You see, the problem with music is this - we musicians want to spend our lives making music, we want to be those people that we grew up listening to, we want to be our idols, our heroes.

We want to be big rock stars, touring the globe, jet setting all around the world, jumping from stage to stage, tour bus to tour bus. We want to be rich, have a big house with a pool.

We want it all.

The problem is, most of us don't have a clue how to get there.

The problem is, we have no idea, looking in from the outside what it all entails, what is involved in getting to that point - how many years it takes to make it 'big', how many shows need to be played for minimal or no pay at all, we have no idea what's the right combination or formula of fans, shows, merchandise, marketing, record sales, etc needed to make a decent living off of music.

Then if we get to that point where money starts coming in, how many extra players are involved - publishers, publicists, managers, booking agents, record labels? And what is their cut from our piece of the pie?

The music biz is not exactly a tried and true formula - if you do x, then y will happen. It's not like that at all.

It's not like a regular job that you go to school for, if you study chemistry you will get a job in a chemical field. It's not fool-proof at all.

The music industry is not as well laid out as that. It's a maze, with many paths and the problem is, all us amateur or semi-pro musicians are all trying to get a piece of the pie, but we might not have the right utensils, heck even many pro musicians are struggling financially.

And how do you continue in a field of work if the income is haphazard and sporadic? Which other professional field do you ever hear of people selling or giving away their services for 'exposure'? Do you ever hear of a newly graduated doctor or lawyer giving away their services cheaply?

And you think that would discourage everyone to get out of this business, but no, the opposite is happening.

And the question is 'why'?

And the only answer is that the love of music, is irrational at best.

And perhaps all us musicians are irrational at best.

And maybe that's our problem.

But how else do we solve it? It's either we get off the boat, or just keep on with it.

Whether we make it big, or just tinkle away in our rooms, music is such a joy.

October

This month feels like four months jammed into one. Many things are happening, too many at the same time.

I took on the gargantuan task of organizing my very first guitar concert with four other guitarists, and a young tenor. This will take place on Sunday, October 18th at Church of the Assumption. It was a monumental challenge, having to arrange so many aspects of the show, coordinate all the different people involved - lights, sound, bar, musicians. Then there was trying to get sponsorship which did not work out so well. Add to that trying to push ticket sales and I can honestly say that booking a gig is a piece of cake as compared to organizing a concert of your very own. It's going to be a good show, we've been rehearsing since August, but has it been a tiring and challenging experience.

Right after that, we move house, October 28th which also happens to the be the anniversary of my Dad's death. What a weird thing to say, what a strange thing to have to live with - someone's death. And packing up after living an entire life in this house is no easy task. But I am looking forward to building new memories in a new neighbourhood. There's some things you can't change, and the fact is that St. James has become a dump, a mechanics' haven and not a single government authority cares about the residents who are still living here enough to enforce the law or proper zoning. Welcome to Trinidad I guess.

Packing up, throwing out and unpacking is very time consuming, it's refreshing and sad at the same time. I'll be glad when November arrives.

I do have a little ray of sunshine, well, it's a big one actually. For the first time in five years, I've found someone. I'm in-love again and it's a great feeling, and she has come into my life at the right time, when all around me is change and chaos. She is my little piece of serenity and joy.

Peace and happiness in the midst of all these life changes is a good thing to have.

This story is unfolding as we all go along our merry little way.

Love - a proper definition

It's not a feeling.

Oh sure, it might start out by liking someone so much that you convince yourself that it must be love.

But it's not.

It's not how often you think of that person during the day, or how much your lives become entwined or how much you miss them when they're not around.

That's infatuation which turns into puppy love eventually. That's the honeymoon version of love, what Hollywood will have us believe.

All that will soon fade as the years frought with trials and struggles begin.

Then and only then will the real version of love truly show itself.

And love is a choice to the do the best for that other person, in spite of everything.

In spite of what you feel.

In spite of all the hurt, all the wrong, the anger, ego and false pretence. Everything that ever will go wrong in a relationship over the course of time, love will win in the end every time.

And in spite of all that, you have to do the right thing, for the other person.

It is not easy, not easy at all. It might break you, it might consume you.

It will test everything you know about yourself. It will force you to question what you think you know of 'love'.

But in the end.

You, I, we. We must do the right thing if we love someone.