Saturday, January 24, 2015

Toenails, pieces of food, crumpled newspaper, shoes and socks

My late father had this great trait, he could manufacture mess and be totally unaware of it. He ate food in front of the TV, everyday, every meal.

He loved the TV, he would dress/undress in front on it. His shoes and socks were constantly in the living room. He would read the paper and have it tucked behind him so it could be pulled out at a moments' notice to double check any interesting articles.

On the odd occasion he would clip his toenails in his chair while watching TV.

All those things would drive me insane whenever I tidied up after him before any of my classes started. I would find all his 'belongings' on the floor beneath his chair.

He made a joke a few times that I had a problem with dust, probably made no sense to him why I was so 'OCD'.

The fact was his untidiness drove me nuts. I couldn't get it. How could he be happy making a mess?

And now that he's gone, I realize how futile and petty it is to get annoyed over those silly things.

Because now, there's nothing I wouldn't give to clean up his mess, as long as it meant having him back here.

I miss you dad.

Sunday, January 18, 2015


Whenever creativity hits me, I go through spells of spending days on end just working on various projects simultaneously. I can't just have one project alone. I need to have a few things happening at the same time.

I read books like that as well. I'll have three, four books on the go. A chapter here, another one there.

I create like that - another solo album, a film score for a documentary, a children's fiction story idea, an autobiography and another idea with short musings that pop in my head from time to time.

Did I mention I also blog?

I don't really have a set plan, just to spend time with each one every other day and do a little more at each creative sitting.

I like compartmentalizing my mind and days like that. Two hours on film scoring, another hour practicing classical, another three hours writing.

It's days like these, that I wish I had 36 hours in a day. And that I don't need so much sleep.

Sunday, January 11, 2015

a box of CDs

I've undertaken the project of unpacking all my CDs and going through them one by one.

Some I'm keeping, others I'm not.

A few I wonder why on earth did I even buy that stuff? I don't even like that music.

Sometimes we grow out of certain music, and yet I've found a few treasures that I completely forgot about.

It's good to go through all the pile of things we own in this life and see, what exactly do we really need? How much do we really consume in this life? I mean, seriously. Human beings over-consume way too much junk that's depleting our environment and our natural resources.

It's good to do a lil inventory re-take once in a while.

Clear out a few things. Reshuffle the mind in the process.

Might take a while though.

I got tons of CDs.

Thursday, January 8, 2015

2015 and many more years to come


It's a new year. To be honest, the fun of welcoming in a new year has lost most of it's appeal for me. Not that I'm getting used to another year. It's just the years of being drunk, screaming, hugging and kissing everyone has run stale.

Maybe it's a youth thing? I'm going to 41 this year. Not that I feel it.

This past Ole Years, I was in Antigua for a gig. When the fireworks went off and people began celebrating, I looked around at all the strangers and suddenly had the urge to be back in the hotel room, watching TV.

Being wasted, exhausted and piss drunk has lost it's appeal. Being productive, making a list of dreams, goals and challenges for a new year, now that's more like it.

Maybe there's something wrong with me?

Sounds reclusive and boring doesn't it? I'd rather be home making plans rather than celebrating another year with drunken strangers. Most of whom don't act their age.

Don't get me wrong, I just think any experience is made fun when you have good friends around.

And all my friends have scattered to various gatherings over the years. Perhaps it's time to get a new group of friends? One who party it up.

Ha! But seriously.

Thank you 2015 for coming around, I'd just rather greet you with sobering hope than drunken stupor.